Chapter 52 - Chapter 50: A Story of Others
By the time the sun sank beyond the horizon and the town was enveloped in darkness, the safety check of all the rooms was finally finished. We found and disposed of about five infected in the apartment after that, but fortunately, we managed to avoid having our presence noticed by the swarms of infected loitering outside.
Many of the room doors were locked, but in an apartment, there's no need to go out of the way to break down the doors. One can just go out onto the balcony from a top-floor room that is unlocked, break the partition to go to the adjacent room, or use the emergency ladder to go down to the floor below and break the window. Even so, it took time for the two of us to go around nearly 40 rooms, and by the time we noticed, it had become night.
And so we established a room on the top floor as our base. It's high up and probably won't be visible from the ground, but the curtains we closed just in case were swaying in the wind blowing in from the window with broken glass. There was only one room on the top floor that wasn't locked, but what greeted me and Naomi-san as we entered was a single rotting corpse.
The owner of the corpse had apparently taken his own life; a rope with a loop at the end was hanging from the ceiling. And the man of the corpse seemed to have committed suicide quite a long time ago; perhaps because he had become brittle due to decomposition, his neck and torso, which had been tightened by the rope, were split in two.
At that time, we no longer had the mental or physical strength left to clean up the corpse. We established the room furthest from the room where we found the corpse as our base and decided to sleep there, but the severed head and torso rolling in Room 408 are still left as they were. Fortunately, since we came after closing the room's windows and doors, the stench of rot doesn't leak outside, but for the sake of Mana-chan's mental health, it was a secret that a corpse was rolling nearby.
As for me, it didn't really matter whether there was a corpse nearby or not. Infected more terrifying than corpses are walking around outside the apartment, and I've long since become accustomed to corpses. More than anything, I, who have produced many corpses regardless of whether they were humans or infected, was no longer a person pure enough to make a fuss over one or two rotting corpses at this late stage.
"Dinner is ready."
I, who had been lying on the sofa in preparation for the night watch, opened my eyes at those words from Yui and a savory smell. Mana-chan, who had been heating a frying pan using a cassette cylinder stove on the table, heaped chunks of meat onto a plate.
It was the remainder of the deer meat that Naomi-san had brought down. Although we escaped Osawa Village, we, who were unable to recover food, began to starve immediately after that. Water can be obtained from rivers and streams, but food doesn't go that easily. We, who were moving through the forest to avoid the infected, had to use the guns we had just obtained to perform hunting.
There was plenty of prey. Wild birds, wild rabbits, squirrels. Those could be caught with simple traps, and they could also be brought down in one shot using a gun or crossbow. Among them, the biggest prey was a deer that Naomi-san found and brought down with a shotgun.
Naomi-san seemed to have often performed hunting using guns even in her birthplace, and she apparently once continued moving for two days chasing prey. Setting aside us, who have hardly even butchered fish, Naomi-san was quickly dismantling the prey she hunted. This meat was also something that was left over at that time and made into jerky.
"Finally, we can have a seasoned meal..."
"Since leaving the village, we could only eat meat that was simply grilled; the vegetables were just unidentified leaves growing around there."
Those leaves also seemed to be "edible" wild plants that Naomi-san had picked, but without seasonings, they were nothing but foul-tasting weeds. Having found preserved foods like canned goods and cooking utensils in this apartment, we were able to have a civilized meal for the first time in several days.
Though, the rice and canned goods lined up next to the grilled meat were things found in the room where that hanging corpse was. Apparently, the man who was in Room 408 had lived in this apartment even after the spread of infection. A large number of empty cans and retort pouch food bags were found in the man's room, and several days' worth of food that hadn't been touched yet was also found.
Since there were no traces of anyone having broken into other rooms, more food would probably be found if we searched all the apartment rooms. Despite that, why did that man choose death for himself? Now that he has become a corpse, the reason is unknown.
Did he despair of this world? Or was he simply tired? Or did he choose death for no particular reason? However, I cannot understand the sensation of going out of one's way to choose death for oneself. And now that I have gone through the experience of thinking I would be killed for sure in Osawa Village, that feeling had become even stronger.
Suddenly, in the hand holding the chopsticks, the sensation of an axe blade rending flesh was revived. Even if I try not to think about it, the many acts I performed in that village will never disappear from my mind.
"You have a scary face. Mana-chan is getting scared."
When I returned to my senses at Yui's words, Mana-chan, sitting on the opposite side of the table, was indeed staring at me with a frightened face. Along with a feeling of apology for having done something bad during a long-awaited mealtime, I noticed that a feeling of half-irritation—wondering what that face was for despite having rescued her—was welling up from the bottom of my stomach, and I was aghast.
Apparently, I have become a more selfish person than before. The fear of real death experienced in Osawa Village has strengthened my feeling of "I don't want to die." The current me might really do anything if it's for the sake of surviving.
The reason I got irritated with Mana-chan was also because somewhere in my heart, there was a feeling of thinking of her as a burden. Ever since meeting us, Mana-chan has been nothing but a person in the position of being protected. Until now, the three of us have always fought and secured Mana-chan's safety.
Even I understand that an elementary school girl couldn't possibly fight properly. However, fighting while protecting someone and surviving in this world is very difficult. As it stands, Mana-chan is nothing but baggage for us.
Even when searching for supplies, one person must be left behind to protect Mana-chan. If we could turn that one person toward the search, or if Mana-chan herself were a person who could fight, we could gather supplies in a shorter time. Even when the infected attack, we have to fight while worrying about our rear (Mana-chan). If she weren't there, we could concentrate on the enemies in front of us.
I understood that was a selfish and cruel thought, but I haven't been able to wipe such thoughts from my head lately. Did the incident in Osawa Village change me, or is stress simply accumulating due to fatigue and hunger? Or was I originally a person with such a twisted way of thinking?
"...Sorry, I'm just a bit tired."
For now, I decided to apologize. If I kept thinking any more, my thoughts seemed likely to bend further in a negative direction.
After the long-awaited proper meal, I left the room with a handgun in one hand. Leaving Yui and Mana-chan, who had already begun to make sleeping breaths, in the room, I softly closed the door.
Naomi-san, who wasn't at the dinner table, should be keeping watch on the rooftop the whole time. In the first place, the reason we chose this apartment was because it's the tallest building in this vicinity. Normally, we would set up simple alarm devices using things like fishing line with empty cans hung around the perimeter, but currently, we don't have the materials. As long as we aren't being noisy, we won't draw the attention of the infected, but even so, there's the word "just in case." In the end, someone has to do the watch.
I climbed the stairs to the rooftop and further climbed the ladder protruding from the wall of the water storage tank that was far taller than an adult's height. Now that the sun has completely set and furthermore, not a single light of civilization like streetlights or neon signs is lit in the town, countless stars are visible in my eyes when I look up at the night sky.
Whether she had noticed I was approaching by the sound of climbing the ladder, Naomi-san greeted me as soon as I got on top of the tank. The water storage tank had enough space for several adults to lie down and still have room to spare, and bottles containing water and binoculars brought by Naomi-san were placed on top of the tank.
"Then, see you in the morning."
Saying that, Naomi-san handed me the rifle equipped with a scope. It's that gun snatched from the garrison members in Osawa Village. If I use the gun, the infected might come near, but it will serve as a substitute for an alarm announcing an emergency. Well, with my skill, I can't possibly do something like sniping an infected at a distance of several hundred meters, though.
"Yes, good night."
For the next five hours, I was scheduled to keep watch on top of this tank. After that, I'm supposed to switch with Yui, and she will continue the watch until morning. In the unlikely event that the infected notice us, I have to inform everyone using the radio.
While listening to the sound of Naomi-san going down the ladder, I sat cross-legged on the roof of the water storage tank and placed the rifle on my knees. Since the handgun on my waist was in the way while sitting, I took it off along with the holster and placed it on the tank. Housed in the holster was a German-made automatic handgun snatched from Yamato's corpse.
A while after Naomi-san left the rooftop, I suddenly felt like it and drew the handgun from the holster. I removed the magazine housed in the grip and pulled the slide to eject the first round from the chamber. Then, gripping the grip, I thrust the muzzle against my own temple and tried to pull the trigger.
But I couldn't. Even though no bullet was in it, I couldn't pull the trigger. If by some mistake a bullet were in this handgun, I could end my life just by pulling my index finger a little. When I thought of that, a feeling of not wanting to die welled up from the bottom of my heart, and even though it was an empty gun, I couldn't pull the trigger.
As I thought, I cannot understand the feelings of people who commit suicide. Realizing that once again, I returned to the work of surveillance. I put the binoculars to my eyes and looked around here and there. However, in a state where moonlight is the only reliance, it's impossible to understand almost anything of the situation on the ground. Occasionally, the shadows of infected wandering the road entered my field of vision, but I couldn't even grasp whether they were male or female.
At such a time, while looking at the south side of the town with the binoculars, I saw two shadows cross the road. The two shadows hid in the shadows of buildings with quick movements and became invisible.
For a moment I thought they were infected, but those aren't the movements of infected chasing prey. Yes, it was just like humans running away from infected.
Besides, if an infected found prey, it would be a huge uproar by now with even more infected gathering due to the roar. Also, since the infected are usually slow, I don't think they would move around that quickly without a reason.
Could they be survivors? Recalling the incident in Osawa Village, I felt my heart grow heavy.