Chapter 145 - Name and Reality 68 {96 Alone} (230–231 Two Wills from Motohashi to Kuboyama)
After finishing the first, I proceeded to read the other letter, said to have been written just before the execution.
Dear Kuboyama,
Originally, the one I wrote earlier was supposed to be my will, but since I remembered something I should say, I'm writing this separately just before the execution.
The most important thing is, the letters addressed to the Dekas must be sent by express mail at the end of September '02. Don't stingy on the stamp money!
Also, the reason I decided to entrust the letters to you after I die is because if I put an envelope inside another envelope beforehand, the prison guards would complain about various things, and I was worried about whether they would arrive properly, so I thought it would be more reassuring to have the Prison Chaplain hand them over directly. You might have been surprised when the monk suddenly showed up, but that's how it is.
Now, at this stage, I thought about various things to leave as final words to you, but what I came up with after much agonizing is that "Even a lie, if carried through to the end, becomes the truth."
A lie told out of consideration for others, if carried through to the end, becomes sincerity and compassion, and will come to be forgiven by anyone. Just because it's a lie doesn't mean everything is no good. It won't hurt to keep at least that in mind.
Anyway, live a long life for my sake too!
Sincerely,
Takeshita felt a great doubt after finishing the two letters. First, in neither of them could he find any instruction in the text for Kuboyama to firmly confirm that Takeshita or Nishida would come to Kuboyama and ask about "Tadano," especially Tadano's whereabouts. Without a doubt, Kuboyama had predicted that Takeshita would ask about Tadano, and this point was extremely unnatural.
"Excuse me. Kuboyama-san, judging from this text, there was at least some exchange of letters with Motohashi-san before this, right? According to this text, was the last time a letter came from Motohashi-san in the form of mail in the summer of '96, a year before the execution?"
"Yeah. Though, the last letter I sent was, because of that kind of case, I thought about the possibility that the execution would be carried out soon and asked Aniki if there was 'anything he wanted as a gift,' but the last letter that came in response to that just said 'Nothing. Your concern is enough. And please don't send any more letters.' So, as a proper letter, it must have been since the reply I got from Aniki after I replied to the letter that came after the ('95) Great Hanshin Earthquake. In other words, before the spring of '95, was the last time a letter came with proper sentences."
After answering that, Kuroda (T/N: likely typo in source—should be Kuboyama) was silent for a while, but,
"I also hardly sent any letters when I thought about Aniki... Or rather, I couldn't send them... Especially after the death penalty was finalized, when I thought about Aniki's feelings, it was difficult... In addition to that, even before the sentence was finalized, a direct visit was almost impossible given my (criminal) record, even if I'm a civilian now. And even for letters, just in case, I sent them disguised under the name of an old acquaintance from Senda Finance so Aniki would understand. If we exchanged too many, there was a risk of being probed, so either way, I couldn't send them that frequently," he spoke as if reminiscing.
On top of that,
"Even so, after the death sentence, I sent one in the summer of '96, but as that text says, I only got a letter back saying 'I'm grateful for the sentiment, but no more letters are needed from now on.' So, when the monk brought the will after (the execution) was carried out, I was certainly surprised," he added.
Hearing this statement from Kuboyama, Takeshita became certain that a code was clearly hidden in one of these two letters, and the other one instructed the method of deciphering it. This was because he could make a clear deduction.
There was no doubt that this series of codes from Motohashi was based on the premise of cooperation from Nishida and Takeshita. If so, they must have been written at least after Nishida, Takeshita, and Yoshimura had contacted Motohashi at the Osaka Detention House. In that case, since the content definitely needed to be written after the autumn of '95, there couldn't have been instructions before the last "proper" letter that came in the spring of '95.
Based on that, looking at the letters again, he thought that, judging by the length, the will written beforehand was likely the one. Looking at the second one written last, based on the premise that Motohashi used the deciphering method of looking at vertical text in a horizontal direction as before (Author's Note: As before, the letters are actually assumed to be written vertically), he felt that there weren't enough lines to give instructions about "Nishida and Takeshita, who would probably ask about Tadano."
Certainly, even though Kuboyama himself was sending letters to Takeshita and Nishida, it seemed too vague for Motohashi to make Kuboyama guess whether the targets would actually ask about Tadano. In the case of "JAYWALK," it was true that the number of lines was almost the same, but considering that it was a brevity based on a certain amount of exchange in previous visits, it seemed that would be impossible this time. If that were the case, the possibility was considered that a code was hidden in the first will, and the deciphering method was hidden in the second will.
Looking at it with that premise, the sentence "Even a lie, if carried through to the end, becomes the truth" was very concerning. If it were a code between yakuza, there should be a commonality in that it was formed by using a horizontal perspective on a vertically written letter as before, and if "carrying through" (T/N: also means 'to pierce through' or 'to traverse') referred to a horizontal crossing, it would be easy to understand. However, because there was a major problem in the text of the first letter for that, Takeshita was slightly confused. So, he decided to check with Kuboyama.
"Which means, if it's Motohashi-san's pattern, I think the hint for the method of reading Motohashi-san's message hidden in this first will is in the second one, and that's this 'Even a lie, if carried through to the end, becomes the truth'..."
When he took a step forward like that,
"Ho, as expected of the Deka Aniki took a liking to!" Kuboyama clapped his hands and rejoiced.
"So it was as I thought..."
Although Takeshita confirmed his reasoning was correct, the problem was how to read it from here on.
Actually, the reason Takeshita was confused was that, unlike the time with Shiino or the letters sent to them this time, the horizontal alignment was not properly organized (Author's Note: Of course, on the site, they are neatly aligned).
"I'm right up to here, but is the reading method different from that one...?"
Takeshita hesitated for a moment, but for now,
"Is there something like a lie in this text?" he asked.
This time, Kuboyama wore a cold smile.
"That 'Takatsu' in the text is the owner of a mahjong parlor Motohashi-no-aniki often went to, where he often played with my direct boss and Aniki's sworn older brother, the late Yoshida-no-oyaji. He wasn't a yakuza, but Aniki and Oyaji favored him. Since no yakuza other than the two of them and a very few trusted subordinates and younger brothers were allowed in, it was valued as a place where the two could talk to their heart's content. That was our connection, but in '87, Takatsu's father died, so he handed over the mahjong parlor to an acquaintance and went out of his way to take over his family's yakitori restaurant, which doesn't make much money. That Takatsu lives in Itami. This is certain because I went there with Aniki after he was expelled, and Aniki should have remembered that too," he said.
"If that's the case, is something hidden in either the horizontal line of 'Kawa' (River) or 'Nishi' (West), which are in the place name 'Kawanishi'?"
When he asked while watching Kuboyama's reaction, he was still grinning, so Takeshita asked a bit more.
"This is the method of reading vertical writing horizontally, right?"
"Well, something like that."
Kuboyama didn't hide his "read it quickly" atmosphere, so for confirmation,
"Wait a moment. But the horizontal alignment is a mess, isn't it?" he further confirmed.
"Hah? For that kind of thing, can't you just count the number of characters from the beginning of each line yourself and line up the characters in the places with the matching order?"
He finally told him as if openly irritated with Takeshita.
"I see! Well, if that's how you read it, you have no choice but to do that..."
Takeshita was convinced for now and decided to count and follow the characters in the matching order from the top in the horizontal lines.
(First will. Re-posted for clarity. Assuming vertical writing. A monitor environment capable of 37 characters per horizontal line is required)
Dear Kuboyama,
It's been a long time. Though, it's a shame to think I'll never see you again.
Well, this is sudden, but was it last summer? After your letter arrived,
I'm very sorry for only replying "No more contact needed from now on."
Actually, even if you were concerned for me, honestly it's meaningless,
so it just made my heart ache. The same thing happened with Takatsu,
so please apologize to him for me. He should be living in Kawanishi,
so I'm sorry for forcing a request on you and causing trouble, but it
shouldn't take that much time. I think if you meet him directly and
explain, he'll forgive me.
Now, the reason I had the Prison Chaplain bring this letter is none other
than because I had another important favor to ask of you. As I think you
saw, in the envelope handed over together with this, you should have
confirmed two letters addressed to the Dekas who interrogated me before.
I don't know the address, but they're letters to guys named Nishida and
Takeshita, detectives at a station in Hokkaido called Engaru, I think.
With just this, I should have just sent them myself, but for a reason,
they're letters I want to send only after the statute of limitations for
the cases I caused has properly expired. Since it's clear the death
penalty will definitely be carried out before then, I have no choice but
to ask you. I wish I could send them myself from the other world.
Also, I can't look up the address for Engaru Station, so I'll leave that
to you too. Afterwards, if you have time, please look up the kanji for
the place name Engaru. It's embarrassing if it's in hiragana. I'm sorry
for asking so many things, but if you think of it as a substitute for
incense money for me, I believe you'll understand, but is that too naive?
If it's you, you'll do it for me, right?
That's it for the business communication, so I thought I'd talk about old
times for the rest. I think the first time I met you was when Aniki
Yoshida brought you to a sushi shop and introduced you directly, how
about it? At first glance, you looked like a gentle type, but from what
I heard from Aniki, you were quite hot-blooded, and it was said one
couldn't imagine it from your appearance. Well, that meaning became
clear when you caused that big incident. Since the statute of limitations
has clearly passed, it's no problem if someone knows, so I'll write it
now, but I heard that Aniki Kagawa, who was the Wakagashira at the time,
was the mastermind. Aniki Yoshida seemed to have agonized over it too,
but that kind of job isn't something you can ask just anyone. Even if
it doesn't lead to the death penalty, you'll constantly have your life
targeted even after getting out. Your standing within the family might
rise, but you'll be forced to live while always being inwardly frightened.
It's impossible unless you're reckless, crazy, or deeply loyal. Of course,
that's not enough. What's important is being tight-lipped. This is the
most important thing. There aren't many guys who are tight-lipped and
have those elements. Because you were reckless, deeply loyal, and tight-
lipped, you were the one who came up as a candidate. It's a shame that
following Aniki's instructions without a word of complaint and being
obedient worked against you. Moreover, your seriousness showed exactly
in the fact that you couldn't take that opponent's life. Even if you're
reckless, being able to kill someone easily is another matter; I can say
that now, and I understood it well. But because I was a less serious
person than you, unfortunately, I've ended up with this kind of end...
And after being released at the end of your term, you gave up on returning
to Aoi, which was your former place. One of the surface reasons for that
was that you couldn't complete the deed and it ended in an attempt that
only caused serious injury. You didn't make a single excuse, but it's not
strange to think you felt you had disgraced Aniki by failing and couldn't
face him. However, as you know, that wasn't the case. Just before you
came out, by Aniki's instruction, you were supposed to switch to being
my subordinate. To be honest, even for me, that was an unexpected turn
of events. However, the executives of Aoi didn't say the plan was no good
from the start either. Despite messing up and getting pinched, the
evaluation of the fact that you didn't 'sing' (T/N: confess) anything bad
at all was higher than expected. (Author's Note: "sing" = confess)
But after you got out, you disappeared to hide yourself, and even when I
finally tracked you down and told you that, you refused, saying "I'm very
grateful, but I can't make excuses for the trouble I caused." I still
think now that what you said was probably your true feelings. But more
than that, the reason you hesitated was, I thought at the time, either
you felt uneasy about your future at least as a gokudo, or you had
regrets about the act of trying to kill itself. On top of that, to make
you change your mind, I would have needed a certain amount of
persuasiveness. But honestly, unfortunately, I didn't have confidence in
that part either. If that were the case, I started to hesitate to stop
you. In the end, I adjusted things in the direction of allowing you to
become a civilian, and so that you wouldn't need to live in hiding, I
settled things with the other group behind the scenes, and after that,
the family decided to drop the talk about you returning. The miscalculation
was that Sakai had let that reach your ears. To put it the other way
around, when I was expelled, the reason you went out of your way to offer
help and became someone I could rely on was because of that, right? Even
so, I never dreamed for a moment back then that I would be the one to
become unemployed, but when I think about what would have happened if I
hadn't taken proper care of you and treated you carelessly, I'm really
glad I did things right. On top of that, afterwards, I'm the one who's
going to be executed for killing people, so you really can't read life
at all. Because I believed that kind of thing was the one thing that
wouldn't happen to me. I'll refrain from saying this and that about the
reason it turned out like this now, but I think if it's you, you'll
understand in your own way. As long as you live as a yakuza, I had the
resolution that I wouldn't be able to die a decent death anyway, but
when it comes to not even being allowed a funeral, it's a painful thing
even if I talk big; it's a pathetic story, but that's reality... Even
so, if I'm told that all the results are my own fault, I can't say
anything back, so honestly I've given up, but at least to you, an
acquaintance, it shouldn't be a sin to vent a little weakness. Even God
must have a limit to how much He makes one suffer... Oops, if I end like
this with just grumbling, it'll be a disgrace to the name of Motohashi
Yukio, the gokudo who prided himself on being a rogue. Please forgive
me for betraying that a little with the samurai's compassion you have.
If we meet next, it'll probably be in hell, but I'm prepared for that!
Well then, see you in hell!
Sincerely,
First, while being careful because they weren't neatly aligned, he looked through the positions of "Kawa" (River) from the side and made notes, and there, the answer was easily found.
"O-re-wa-ta-tsu-ka-wa-ni. mo-tsu-mi-wo-tsu-gu-na-wa-se-ru-tsu-mo-ri-ya-te-ga-mi-no-de-ka-no-da-re-ka-ga-ki-ta-ra-ta-da-no-ni-tsu-i-te-ki-i-te-ku-ru-ha-zu. ki-ka-re-ta-ko-to-ni-ko-ta-e-te-ya-re-ta-no-mu-wa. ta-da-no-ni-mo-yo-ro-shi-ku-ta-no-mu-wa."
In other words, if re-read, it would be:
"I intend to make Tatsukawa pay for his crimes too. If one of the Dekas from the letters comes, they should ask about Tadano. Answer what you're asked, I'm counting on you. Give my regards to Tadano too."