Chapter 197 - The Reality of the Hero's Party
Volume one of the book is now on sale!
We're currently surveying character popularity and more through an official questionnaire, so if you're interested, please check it out!
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https://over-lap.co.jp/865543926
I've gotten information like, "Surprisingly, that character is popular..." and it's making me think about increasing that person's screen time (you'll probably figure out who it is if you read it).
Also, on Twitter, we're currently soliciting an abbreviated title for the work.
The official abbreviation hasn't been decided yet... even though it's such a long title...
So, if you could tweet using the hashtag below, the author would be delighted.
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#異世界帰りのおっさんは父性スキルでファザコン娘達をトロトロに略称 <- the title as hashtag
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What awaited us at the deepest part of the dungeon was the Golden Temple.
This was the goal. Our adventure this time would finally end.
I advanced into the temple and opened the treasure chest.
"Gyaoooooooooooo!"
Then, suddenly, a swarm of Lizardmen dropped down from the ceiling.
—A trap!
Teacher and I stepped forward, while the two in the rear guard immediately shifted into a support formation.
The battle situation was deadlocked.
The quality of each individual wasn't much, but there were simply too many of them.
"...Tch."
Eventually, a particularly large Lizardman swung its halberd in a circular arc.
A horizontal line.
No good, I can't dodge it completely.
It's going to hit!
The next moment, I felt a horrible sensation, like a cold blade passing through my body.
"...Huh?"
When I came to, my height had been halved.
Why? What happened to me?
Fearfully, I looked down at my own feet.
...They weren't there.
There was no such thing as "my feet."
Because my body had lost its lower half.
Since my torso was now touching the ground directly, I should describe it as my waist area, not my feet.
"...You're kidding."
Driven by terror, I turned my head to look back.
I could see my lower half, from the navel down, standing there in a daze.
My other half, spraying fresh blood.
The glistening intestines were still writhing even now.
"Hero-dono!? Aaaaaaaaaa! Recovery Magic: Heal! Recovery Magic: Heal Recovery Magic: Heal Recovery Magic: Heal Recovery Magic: Heal!"
Philia let out a shriek and frantically repeated her recovery magic.
Combined with the auto-recovery magic she had cast on me beforehand, my lower half visibly regenerated before my eyes.
"That saves me!"
I immediately regained my stance and slashed at the Lizardman.
...Humanoid enemies are still hard to deal with, but it's a different story when it's the opponent who cut me in two.
My mind was burning bright red, dyed with rage.
"Ooooooooooooooooh!"
I channeled magic power into my limbs, let out a roar, and launched a charge.
Perhaps overwhelmed by my fighting spirit, the lizard warriors showed a momentary flinch.
—An opening!
I leaped up with all my might using my newly regrown legs.
As if tracking me, Enhancement Magic: Buff flew in with a series of whooshing sounds.
"Gyaooooooooo!"
My sword, enhanced multiple times over, cut down the Lizardman in a single stroke.
Continuing, I made a horizontal sweeping slash, breaking the enemy's front line.
I confirmed the group carrying shields toppling one after another.
"Alright!"
When I raised my right hand, Erin launched a fireball into the center of the enemy formation.
With this, their side was in a complete rout.
"Prepare yourselves, you lizard bastards. If you're gonna cut your tails and run, now's the time."
"I wondered how it would turn out at first, but we managed somehow."
I let out a sigh of relief and sheathed my sword.
It had been half a year since my torso was bisected, but it's not something you get used to.
"Thank you, Philia. I was saved thanks to your recovery. ...Philia?"
So.
I was about to thank our healer, who had shown tremendous contributions in this battle, but...
For some reason, that priestess was covering her face with both hands.
Looking closely, there were gaps between her fingers, but what in the world is she trying not to see...?
Or rather, is it more like she actually wants to see it so badly she can't stand it, but is desperately restraining herself?
"...Philia?"
What's wrong? I took a step closer.
Looking closely, Erin and Teacher were also covering their eyes with both hands in the same way.
"No, what's wrong with you guys?"
Please check your own appearance, Philia said in a shrill voice.
"My appearance?"
That's when I finally realized it.
...The enemy had sliced off my lower half.
And that was regenerated with magic. But what regenerates is only the flesh-and-blood parts.
In other words, the reason it felt strangely drafty below my navel was...
"It's poison for the eyes, so hurry up and go strip the clothes off that lower half standing stock-still over there!"
"...I saw... the Hero's sacred sword..."
"I-I don't mind if you stay as you are. If Hero-kun has truly taken a liking to that appearance, I shall accept it."
From the top: Philia, Erin, Teacher Lili.
While murmuring my thanks in my heart for their three distinct reactions, I rushed off in a great panic to retrieve my clothes.
"Ugh, the intestines are still moving."
Amazed at how stubborn it was, being the Hero's other half, I pulled the pants off.
They were covered in blood, but I couldn't be picky at a time like this.
...If the Lizardmen wore clothes, I probably could have looted something decent, but those guys are barbarians who wear armor over their bare skin.
"This is awful. Even the inside of the underwear is a bloody mess."
Maybe this will help Hero-kun understand a woman's heart a little, Teacher joked, walking a very fine line.
As for Philia, she was shouting, "You! You! How dare you chop up my Hero-dono!" while beating the Lizardman corpse with her staff, making cracking sounds. Her behavior, overflowing with lust and violent impulses, made her look nothing like a holy woman.
"...It's amazing she can function as a priestess like that, seriously."
As I sat down in disbelief, I heard a crackling sound, like something burning.
It was the sound of Erin roasting a Lizardman whole.
The petite magical girl was sprinkling salt on the lizard-man with practiced hands.
"...Dinner..."
Want some? Her blue eyes asked.
...Well, look.
You're not part of the Human Race, so I get that your ethics are a bit different from ours.
But I want to tell you to show a little more resistance to eating demi-humans.
Sure, the face is a lizard and it has a tail, but the overall silhouette is humanoid, right?
I was about to ask, "Are you really okay with that?" but—
"Ahahahahahahaha! Serves you right, dying and being eaten! Ahahahahahahahaha!"
...I was about to ask, but...
I saw Philia, who should be the same Human Race as me, laughing loudly while biting into the roasted Lizardman, and I just stopped caring about everything.
"I'm hungry too, so I guess I'll dig in."
And so, we ended up having a slightly early dinner.
When you're in this world, you often get caught up in philosophical thoughts like, "What is justice?"
By my sensibilities, chowing down on humanoid, intelligent monsters is an act leaning towards evil, but adventurers in this world do it with great joy.
I guess it's a feeling of, "Even in death, the enemy is still hated."
Well, royalty and warriors aside, ordinary villagers and Elsa don't do that sort of thing.
Somehow, I feel like maybe only people with an aptitude for it stand on the battlefield, so they progressively move in a more brutal direction.
Becoming more radicalized, so to speak.
On Earth, through things like conscription, people whose temperaments aren't suited for combat also get sent to the front lines, so maybe that puts a certain brake on the methods of fighting... no, wait, were Earthlings pretty extreme in their own way too?
As I was lost in such thoughts, there was a woman inching closer and closer to me.
It was Philia.
Wondering what she was thinking, she approached on all fours, a beautiful older-sister smile on her face.
What Philia was wearing now was a thin priestess robe.
She wasn't wearing anything fancy like a bra, so even through the clothes, you could see her large breasts hanging down loosely.
I think that's very alluring.
But why does it instantly give off a horror vibe when she's covered in Lizardman blood spatter?
Precisely because she's beautiful, there's an uncanny intensity to it.
"...Um, Philia-san? What are you planning to do?"
"I'm going to feed you, this meat right here."
In Philia's hand was a knife with what looked like a piece of Lizardman flesh skewered on it.
"...You mean, you're going to do the 'say ahh' thing with a demi-human corpse?"
"You're happy, aren't you?"
That's terrifying.
As expected of someone who's still a virgin past thirty, she really doesn't understand a man's heart.
No, is this even about a man's heart? Doesn't this person just not understand human hearts in general?
As I froze up, Philia smiled and said, "You are, aren't you? You're so happy you can't even speak, aren't you?"
"Here, say ahh."
Philia closed the distance between us with a crawling motion and dropped the piece of meat into my mouth.
"...It's tasty, I guess."
Lizardman meat tastes similar to chicken.
Or rather, maybe all dragon-like creatures are mostly like that.
"See? See? Come now, I'll feed you everything today."
With a dangerous smile on her face, Philia kept tossing meat into my mouth one after another.
...Looking closely, the highlights had vanished from her eyes.
This woman has been like this ever since I started dating Elsa.
"Right? Right? I'm better than Lady Elsa, aren't I? I'd make a better girlfriend, wouldn't I? Does Lady Elsa do this kind of thing for you? She doesn't, does she? But I'll do it for you, you know? A meal fed to you by a woman's hand is exceptional, isn't it? Shall I even feed you mouth-to-mouth? Oh my, you have a smudge around your mouth. Shall I wipe it with a cloth? Or would you prefer I lick it off? Hey, Hero-dono? Hey? Why are you scared? Hero-dono. Look at me. Please look at me. Hero-dono... Hero-dono Hero-dono Hero-dono Hero-dono... I love you... I love you so much... please look this way... Hero-dono... break up with Lady Elsa...! Uuuuu!"
Before I could even answer, she'd already chosen to lick it off and clean it.
This one's a lost cause, isn't she?
She's out, both as a priestess and as a human being.
As I was gazing distantly at the golden walls, Teacher murmured quietly.
"By the way, Hero-kun. That lower half of yours discarded over there seems to still be breathing."
"Um, you see that boy getting his chin licked all over by a Party Member, and that's what you have to say?"
"In my assessment, it's actually more dangerous not to let her lick you. Let Philia do as she pleases for a while. ...That lower half, would you mind if I took it?"
What are you going to use it for? I asked in a dead voice.
"Well. This may be surprising, but my family home practices Alchemy. The half-body of a Summoned Hero would likely make for good research material."
While soothing the sobbing Philia, I answered, "Sure, I don't see why not."