Chapter 214 - Duelists
Dammit, there's no point in moping around.
As the head of the family and the party leader, I have to step up and make a decisive call.
"Alright, I get it. If you're going to insist, then you all perform proper presentations. Stop appealing to emotion and explain the logical merits of bringing you along."
"A presentation?"
Angelica looks blankly at me, as if asking what that is.
The other otherworldly girls—Chloe and Philia—had similar reactions.
...I think I'm an incredibly gentlemanly person for including the forty-five-year-old Philia in the "girls" category.
"Each of you, appeal to me regarding why it would be best to take you out of the three of you. Like, 'I can use this kind of magic' or 'I can make this kind of contribution.' It's something people normally do before forming a party, right?"
"Is it like when you're looking for travel companions at the Adventurers' Guild?"
"Exactly, that kind of vibe. Like, 'I am a priest so I can use Recovery Magic, I can use it up to three times a day, and I cannot carry overly heavy equipment,' and so on."
It's kind of like a part-time job interview, Rio, the modern person, mutters with a word that contains not a shred of romance.
"Wait, why is even the High Priest a candidate? It's bad business to include someone who has regressed to an infant in our combat strength!"
"Nah, that's not quite true. He's the one who said to take him along."
"Eh? Is that so?"
Angelica glances at Philia's face, wondering when that happened.
In that instant, I didn't miss the way Philia's expression stiffened.
That's how it is.
If Philia wants to undertake an infiltration mission with me, she has to confidently present herself in front of everyone.
In short, she needs to come clean that she has actually returned to her senses.
And she might as well reconcile with Angelica quickly.
"A-auu auu aa—"
"The High Priest is definitely still acting strange. Maybe Father just misheard him?"
...What a terrible performance.
Fine then, if that's how you want to play it, I'll exclude you from the candidates this time.
"That leaves a two-way choice between Ange and Chloe. Now, give me a thorough presentation on which one of you is more profitable to bring."
Mumu, Angelica frowns and glares at Chloe.
They look like they might start a duel at any moment.
"Haa. I understand. I just need to convince Father with words regarding how useful I am as a combat asset, right?"
As she speaks, Angelica stands up straight. Then, she places a hand on her chest and says:
"I am an expert in Recovery Magic, I am sturdier than I look, and as a bonus, I can act as a human radar, so don't you think I'm a bargain? Being able to grasp the location and number of enemies from a distance is a feat Chloe-san cannot perform."
"That's true. That's the biggest merit of bringing Ange along."
To be blunt, since I can win against anyone in a normal fight, it's certainly true that I value personnel who can provide support in auxiliary roles more than raw combat power.
If that's the case, the advantage might go to Angelica, who can use sensing skills, rather than Chloe, who is just a magic swordsman.
"Ange really is useful..."
"Right!? Isn't it!? Please use me! Please use me every night!"
"Stop using weird phrasing."
While my head was completely filled with thoughts of Angelica, Chloe stood up this time.
"I see. Unlike that Holy Maiden over there, I do not possess skills like sensing. I am merely a female knight proficient in sword and magic. However, that does not change the fact that I am a useful person."
"Well, you're probably stronger than Angelica, but for combat, I'm sufficient on my own."
"That is not it. I believe I can provide physical and mental care for Lord Father. This is something Angelica should be unable to do."
"...What does that mean?"
Does she have a trump card?
Don't tell me she's mastered some ultimate sword technique that even I don't know about?
As I was getting carried away by myself—thinking, She really is a genius since she carries my blood, my genes are doing great, yeah, it's mostly thanks to me, right?—Chloe pulled some sort of bundle of paper from her pocket.
"This."
Looking closely, they were business-card-sized cards made by cutting flyers into rectangles.
When I flipped one over, it had "Shoulder Rub Ticket" written on it in rounded, girly handwriting.
And there were dozens of them.
"Could it be... is this the 'Daughter's Homemade Shoulder Rub Ticket'!?"
"Exactly," Chloe nodded.
"I don't quite understand it myself, but I heard that men who have reached a certain age find healing in things like this."
"There's a point to that! ...No, there are ten points to that! ...Whoa, I'm seriously happy... somehow this hits harder than sexual advances..."
As I found myself tearing up, I saw Angelica trembling in the corner of my vision.
It was the sign that her jealousy had been ignited.
"W-what is that!? That has nothing to do with combat at all! Please take this seriously!?"
"I am taking it seriously. Since Lord Father is the strongest in the world, there is no meaning in supporting him with swords or magic. In that case, it is better for me to specialize in the role of healing his mental and physical fatigue."
"I can do that too! Anyone can do a shoulder rub!?"
"Not necessarily. Because Lord Father's defense is too high, the person rubbing his shoulders must have a certain level of stats for it to be effective. If you were to do it, I believe it would end up feeling like you're just tickling his shoulders."
That's a valid point, I agreed.
My whole body is so hard that those kinds of massage chairs don't work on me at all.
"Th-then... is it impossible for anyone but Chloe-san to soothe Father's shoulders...?"
"That's how it is."
"...Then... the shoulder rubs I've been giving Father until now... were meaningless...?"
That's not true; since Angelica's breasts hit my back quite a bit, there was undoubtedly a relaxation effect.
While I was thinking things I could never say even if my mouth were torn open,
"Well, if a daughter of a certain age rubs her father's shoulders, her breasts will touch his back. If you think of it as serving Lord Father with your bust, there was probably a point to it."
Chloe uttered words that seemed to trace my thoughts exactly.
It was an utterly depraved statement that made me feel a definite blood connection.
"Is that so... were the shoulder rubs I've done until now not in vain...?"
"Yes! I don't think it was a useless endeavor at all."
"Chloe-san...!"
"Therefore, from now on, you can rest easy and leave that role to me. Rubbing Lord Father's shoulders while pressing my breasts against them—I am the most suited for that. After all, a shoulder rub is something a daughter does in the first place to communicate the progress of her bust growth. I, who am still in the midst of growth, am more appropriate than someone with a fully developed body like you."
"...Ugh, uuu..."
Was a shoulder rub such an evil culture?
As expected of someone with a Father Complex skill, I feel like Chloe's screws are a little loose.
Above all, the scariest thing is that none of the other women are calling out her current outrageous logic.
Apparently, in their industry, those are perfectly normal values.
"...I... cannot soothe Father's shoulders... I cannot make shoulder rub tickets..."
As Angelica collapsed to her knees, Chloe wore a smile of victory.
Is this okay?
Is it okay for the partner for the infiltration mission to be decided by such a trivial contest?
Am I going to become a Hero who just gets his shoulders rubbed while a beautiful girl presses her breasts against him? Isn't that a Demon Lord instead of a Hero?
While I was being confused from various perspectives, Angelica stood up unsteadily.
A strong light dwelt in her eyes.
It seemed she had grasped a clue for a reversal.
"...That was... close. A biological daughter's shoulder rub ticket. That is a trump card; it is the Gold Card of the Father Complex world. I almost got swept away."
"If you know that, why are you standing up? The match was decided long ago. Lord Father's shoulder blades exist specifically so my breasts can be pressed against them, you know?"
"...That may be so. But there are things that only I, who have no blood relation, can create...!"
"Heh?"
While I was at a loss, wondering if someone would please return to their senses soon, Angelica tore a small piece from a flyer that had been tucked into the morning paper and began writing something with a pen.
Chloe watched her and laughed.
"Hahaha! You're going to make a shoulder rub ticket too!? It's useless; these only have value because a biological daughter does them...! Even if you make one, the sanctity of family togetherness won't sprout from it...!"
"I know that! That's why I—am making this!"
On the scrap of paper Angelica brandished like a sacred talisman, she had scribbled: "Womb Tap Ticket."
"...Could you explain what that means, Holy Maiden Angelica?"
"It means exactly what it says! This is a ticket that allows you to tap on my w* anytime!"
"Th-th-that means... is it a ticket for unlimited sex!?"
"That's right! Unlike you, since I have no blood relation, it's safe even if I have a physical relationship with Father! That's why I can make as many risky tickets as I want!"
"Impossible...!?"
It must have been quite a shock, as Chloe was blown backward several meters.
The shoulder rub tickets she had been holding fluttered through the air.
The composition felt like something out of a card game series.
It was a bad example of how high physical ability combined with playing along can create such a scene.
...So, in the end, which one should I take?