Chapter 95 - Chapter 92: Episode 90 - Awareness
A week had already passed since Seon-ah and the Demon King had been intimate.
Seon-ah didn't want to leave the bedroom.
He feared the way other demons in the Royal Castle looked at him—like they were undressing him with their eyes.
In this Demon World, any demon could violate him at any moment.
Having spent a little over two years watching them climb on top of him and thrust until they were satisfied, Seon-ah knew exactly what they thought he was.
A toy. A stud. A sex slave. A piece of meat.
He remembered how the demons had treated him all this time.
Even when they forced themselves on him because he was too weak to fight back, he had no choice but to suffer in silence.
The masculinity he'd held in his previous life had been trampled by Yu-rin, and the memories he'd gained in this life had been toyed with by Miel.
Then the succubus sisters and the soldiers had violated him, making him feel the overwhelming difference in power, treating him like every other male in this world.
Not a single woman he'd ever known had respected him.
It was a horrifying, persistent rape driven only by their own desires.
An indiscriminate gang rape, like he was a toy passed from hand to hand.
Every sexual act he'd experienced in this world had been exactly like that.
Except for one person.
Only the Demon King—who had taken over the body of his mother, whose name he didn't even properly know—had respected him.
Of course, it had started close to rape, mixed with verbal abuse and insults, but when he refused, she showed regret and respected his wishes.
For Seon-ah, having his wishes respected during sex was a first.
She wore his mother's face.
Now, just thinking about her tone of voice made him realize she was a completely different person.
Every time he woke up, he found himself liking it more and more that she held him in her arms.
She hadn't tried to have sex with him since that day, but sleeping in the same bed, sharing body heat, gave him a deep sense of mental satisfaction.
Seon-ah didn't fully realize it himself, but unlike the endless violations after he became an adult—where he'd only ever had purely physical relationships—this was his first time experiencing a real mental connection.
For the first time in this life, he felt his heart being filled.
But he couldn't accurately identify the emotion.
In a way, she was the enemy who had taken over his mother's body.
He knew well enough that their relationship was bound only by a contract.
But deep down, he felt she was different from those who had violated him.
And he felt she was special.
At first, she had seen him as a tool to increase her bloodline.
She had only thought of him as a male with the seed to create new royals, her consort.
She had purged those who harmed him so she could treat him as a royal.
But the moment she made the contract and shared his bed, she knew.
She understood what the emotion was.
Seeing him cry made her heart ache.
Watching him wail madly, pushing her away and resisting, she realized.
That she could never win his love in this body.
A suffocating frustration dominated her heart.
She no longer felt like demanding sex from him.
She was trapped in a body that couldn't even be intimate with him without saying harsh things.
When she first obtained this body, she had been overjoyed to have such a powerful vessel, but.
That was no longer the case.
Ever since she realized her feelings for him, she hated this body.
She didn't want to play the role of his mother.
She.
Wanted to be his lover.
But as she was now, he perceived her as something like an unknown terror.
She hated being looked at with eyes full of fear, as if the person he knew had changed into something else.
Even the situation where she had to desperately persuade him that she didn't want to be in this body.
Even the fact that the body's original owner was pressing in, threatening to devour her spirit at any moment.
Everything was so hard.
She had been transferring her soul into different bodies for thousands of years, but she had never faced a hurdle like this.
Now, only one option remained.
The only way left was to create a vessel between them—through their child—to transfer her spirit and soul, and obtain a new body.
Of course, since even being intimate with him was difficult, she intended to wait until she won his heart.
She had already learned that forcing herself on him would only bring pain to both of them.
She was impatient, knowing she had to wait until he felt something for her as a lover, not just as a partner bound by contract.
But considering all the wrong she'd done to him, she thought it was fortunate things had gone this far.
She even felt self-loathing at the thought that it was a huge relief he seemed to have lost his memories after waking up—despite everything terrible that had happened.
It was a cheap price for nearly destroying his most precious memories.
So even if it meant waiting indefinitely, she had to wait until the end.
That was the apology she owed him.
Seeing the Demon King leave the bedroom to attend to her duties as morning brightened, Seon-ah said,
"Have a safe trip."
The Demon King gently pulled Seon-ah into an embrace and stroked his hair.
"Lee Seon-ah, I'll be going now. I'll say it again—if you need anything while I'm away, tell the attendant outside the door."
She said it every time, but Seon-ah still tried not to speak to other demons at all.
He understood why—in Min-ah's memories, Seon-ah had been violated too many times whenever he got involved with other demons.
"Yes. Thank you, always."
Seon-ah answered to follow the Demon King's lead, but he had no intention of actually talking to the attendant outside.
Ever since Miel, he'd never managed to form a proper relationship with any demon he got involved with.
Because of the brutal way demons had violated him, to him they were beings who only did terrible things—except for one person.
"Then, I'll see you in the evening."
The moment the Demon King turned to open the door and leave, she felt a hand grabbing her clothes.
"Um... Demon King-nim... there's something I've been wondering..."
It was a sudden touch from Seon-ah, but the Demon King wasn't surprised at all.
She had noticed Seon-ah's behavior over the past few days—he'd looked like he wanted to say something but kept swallowing it back.
She herself was curious about what he wanted to say, but she had been waiting for him to speak on his own.
She thought she would finally hear the words Seon-ah had been holding back all this time.
"Demon King-nim... why are you so good to me?"
The Demon King looked at Seon-ah and smiled brightly.
"At first, it was because I made you my consort. The contract was created to increase my bloodline through you."
Seon-ah had been thinking it was just a formal marriage where he provided the seed, all due to the contract.
The Demon King was about to feel disappointed that it wasn't much different from what Seon-ah thought.
"But there's something I've felt while being with you all this time. I like you... I'm in love with you, Lee Seon-ah."
Seon-ah couldn't answer those words from the Demon King, even though he'd heard them before.
The Demon King, with his mother's face, looked cute as she confessed with her face bright red.
His mind was in turmoil at the thought that what he'd just felt made no sense at all.
A demon had confessed to him—one who wore his mother's face—and his heart had been swayed.
The Demon King turned around again, still blushing.
"Then I'll be going."
Leaving Seon-ah frozen, unable to say anything, the Demon King walked out of the bedroom.
He heard the attendant outside greet her, then listened as her footsteps faded away. Seon-ah collapsed onto the bed.
His face, pressed against the mattress, was as red as the Demon King's had been.
Flushed, Seon-ah covered his face with his hands and thought.
His feelings for a woman who wore his family's face, whose name he didn't even know yet—it was all so confusing.
In a way, she was the enemy who had possessed his mother's body, so the emotions he carried were far too complicated.
'Do I like that woman?'
The thought made no sense.
He had thought she was special and different from the other women he'd been with, but that didn't mean it was the kind of special that meant he liked her.
He had just seen her as a woman who respected him.
But after that confession, everything had changed.
He, too, had begun to be drawn to the Demon King.
She was someone with whom he had no physical relationship beyond sleeping and waking up together in bed every day since the night she'd violated him.
After that confession, it felt like she was waiting for his answer—even though she could violate him at any time with all her power.
Seon-ah lay on the bed, thoughts of her drifting blankly through his mind.
He had often pondered while staring at the ceiling.
But this time, the worry in Seon-ah's heart wasn't a painful one.