Chapter 397 - Chapter Seven: Love
The days of endlessly continuing golem operation training became, in Noein's life, a hardship like never before.
To get used to golem operation, there was no choice but to repeatedly perform the operations. Thinking this, Noein continued moving the golem for hours every day, until his mind grew distant. He made the golem thrust out both its fists, made the golem walk, and simply continued doing that.
Even though it was only simple operations, and no matter how abundant Noein's magical power was, continuing that much training was not easy. After once fainting from mana depletion and causing Matilda great worry, he made sure to rest appropriately, but even so, the mental fatigue from excessive concentration could not be suppressed, and by the time each day's training ended, he was completely exhausted.
About a month and a little more had passed, repeating such days of training. Amidst there being no particularly visible results so far, Noein, who had been moving the golem all morning again today, was taking a nap in his bed for rest after eating lunch.
The season was late autumn. Wrapped in the soft sunlight pouring in from the window, drifting in a doze, Noein suddenly felt a presence near his face. That gentle presence was Matilda's.
He wasn't asleep, but he wasn't fully awake either. In that hazy consciousness, Noein felt Matilda so close that her breath reached his cheek.
The gentle presence lingered right beside his face, and the time when her breath touched his cheek continued for a while.
Matilda was probably staring intently at the face of the sleeping Noein from up close. Wondering why she was doing such a thing, as Noein hesitated whether to open his eyes, something soft touched his lips.
When he opened his eyes slightly, Matilda had brought her face close to Noein's mouth. The soft thing that touched him was her lips.
Matilda kissed him several times, as if pecking at Noein's lips. And then, she sucked on Noein's lips.
The surface of Noein's lips moistened with Matilda's saliva. Finishing that slightly bold kiss, Matilda raised her face from near Noein's mouth — and their gazes met, with Noein's eyes now wide open in surprise.
"Ah!"
Finally noticing that Noein was awake, Matilda jumped back from the bed with a startled expression.
"Matilda?"
"I-I am terribly sorry!"
Noein called out to her calmly, but Matilda said, her face pale. And then, still pale-faced, she prostrated herself on the spot.
"I am terribly sorry! For a mere slave to do such a thing, I am terribly sorry!"
Wondering how to respond to Matilda, who kept repeating this, Noein first got down from the bed and knelt on the floor. Then, bringing his eyes level with hers, he said to her, "Lift your head, Matilda," making sure it sounded as gentle as possible.
Noein smiled at Matilda, who fearfully lifted her face.
"Can you tell me why you kissed me?"
"I-I am sorr—"
"It's alright. I'm not angry. I just want to know what you think of me, Matilda. Tell me?"
To Noein, who asked while keeping his tone extremely calm but directing a straight gaze at her, Matilda opened her mouth, though timidly.
"...I adore you. I love you from the bottom of my heart, Lord Noein. I understand it is an incredibly arrogant emotion for a slave. Not only that, but to kiss you without permission while you were sleeping, Lord Noein, is an unforgivable act. I will accept any punishment."
Matilda said this with a face as if resigned to death. When she finished speaking, she squeezed her eyes shut tightly, put strength into her hands, and waited for Noein's words.
Noein thought for a moment about what to say to her — and decided to say nothing, and instead embrace her.
"...Huh?"
Matilda flinched for a moment, and when she realized she was being embraced, she opened her eyes wide in surprise.
"Thank you, Matilda. I'm happy. Happy, really happy."
This time, it was Noein who brought his face close enough for his breath to reach her and spoke to Matilda.
"Hey, Matilda, you love me, right? Why do you love me? How do you love me? How much do you love me? Tell me?"
And then, he asked this. Matilda, gazing back at Noein from a distance of a few centimeters, thought, and spoke haltingly.
"...I was sold as a slave by my parents, whom I trusted as a child, and was treated horribly by the other servants and slaves in this mansion, despairing every day. I thought no one would ever be kind to me again, that everyone in the world hated me."
"..."
Noein already knew about Matilda's upbringing.
Her birth family was a tenant farming household in a certain rural village within the Kivileft County territory. Her parents treasured only the eldest brother and didn't really cherish the other children. The siblings other than the eldest brother would suddenly disappear from the house when they reached a certain age.
Even in such an environment, she adored her birth parents. When she was a little over five years old, she was handed over to a strange man, and saw her parents off as she left home, clutching the gold coins they received.
Then, she was brought to this mansion, grew older amidst harsh, incomprehensible days, and eventually learned that she had been sold to a slave trader by her parents. She learned that her other siblings had also been sold as slaves, and that her turn had finally come that day.
Noein had heard from her before that she had such a past.
"But Lord Noein was different. Lord Noein was kind to me. Lord Noein... on that day, the first day we met, you petted me. You held me."
Tears spilled from Matilda's eyes.
"From that day on, my life changed. No, it began. Before that, I had no life; I was nothing. Now, I am filled with happiness. All of it is happiness given to me by Lord Noein. You gave me my life, Lord Noein. That's why..."
Matilda, pouring out her feelings while crying, was unbearably cute, and Noein placed his hand on her cheek. Matilda gently placed her own hand over his, continuing to speak.
"That's why I love you, Lord Noein. I want to dedicate everything I am to you. I want you to have every part of my body, from a single strand of hair to a single drop of blood. I want to use all of my time for you, Lord Noein. I want to use all of my heart to love you, Lord Noein. I want to become a part of you, Lord Noein. You are the entire meaning of my life. I love you. I'm so sorry. I love you."
Matilda finished her long confession, and Noein, who had listened to it — smiled.
"Ah..."
And then, he let out a breath.
So this is love, he thought.
He knew the concept of 'love' as knowledge. It appeared in various books. To a partner, to a parent, to a child, to a friend. As the greatest goodwill a person can offer another, love was recorded in countless stories, in history, in memoirs and diaries.
Now, Noein received it from Matilda. Thanks to her, Noein came to know love.
No, perhaps he had been receiving it all along. Noein had vaguely noticed that Matilda was directing towards him a feeling different from the squirrels and chicks he had doted on in the past — a deeper, hotter emotion. That was love.
Being told "I love you" along with a certain heat and emotion, being told with exhaustive words how much she cherished him, how special he was to her. Having her shed tears for him. Having what he gave her affirmed, having himself affirmed.
What a wonderful thing love is. How happy it is to receive love.
Noein felt his heart being filled. It was accompanied by an exhilaration that made his body tremble, and at the same time, a tranquility that made him feel he could live with just this — an unprecedented, omnipotent happiness.
"...Matilda."
Noein deepened his smile as he called the name of the being before him who loved him.
It was a smile that defied common sense. It was a bizarre smile that would seem insane to an onlooker.
"Lord Noein..."
However, Matilda found Noein, who wore such a smile, to be lovable. Knowing that Noein was happy to receive her love, she too felt joy.
"Thank you, Matilda. I... I love you too. I love you from the bottom of my heart, Matilda."
Saying this, Noein embraced Matilda.
The strange feeling he had felt until now when doting on Matilda, when touching her. A feeling more complex and grander than when he had played with squirrels and chicks. A feeling as if all negative emotions — loneliness, anxiety — were melting away.
This must be love, Noein thought. He was convinced that he had loved Matilda, that this strange feeling was love.
"...Is this a dream?"
Matilda, who had been silent for a while while being held by Noein, murmured such a thing.
"Ahaha, of course not. See, it's this warm, isn't it?"
Saying this, Noein held Matilda even tighter. Their bodies pressed together so closely they could feel each other's heartbeats, sharing their body heat.
Matilda's tears spilled onto Noein's shoulder, warmly wetting the collar of his clothes.
Matilda's arms wrapped around Noein's back, holding him so tightly that Noein felt a slight pain. Matilda's body, clinging to Noein, trembled slightly.
"...I am the happiest slave in the world."
Matilda's hot breath brushed against Noein's ear.
"I'm happy too, Matilda. Your love has made me happy."
Answering thus, Noein loosened his arms holding Matilda a little and met her eyes.
This time, when Noein tried to press his lips to hers, Matilda showed a fearful expression.
"What's wrong, Matilda? Did you not like the kiss?"
Noein asked, also looking a little uneasy, and Matilda hurriedly shook her head.
"No, that's not it. There's no way I would reject you, Lord Noein. It's just... I remembered the feeling I had when I kissed you earlier. The feeling I had when I imagined the day when I would have to part from you, Lord Noein, which will surely come someday."
"...?"
Noein wondered what she was talking about. They loved each other. Of course they would be together forever from now on. There was no reason to part, and he had no intention of parting.
"Lord Noein, you said you would likely be driven out of this mansion when you come of age. If that happens, I, a slave owned by the Kivileft Count household, will be sent back to work in the main building. A life where I cannot be by your side, Lord Noein, is not my life. The day you leave this mansion, Lord Noein, will be the day my life ends... Thinking that such a day will come in a few years, I couldn't bear the loneliness and sadness, and I ended up doing something like that to you while you were sleeping."
Hearing this story, Noein caught his breath.
And then, he thought about what a terrible thing he had done to her.
For quite some time now, Noein had been thinking he wanted to keep her by his side even after he was eventually cast out of the Kivileft Count household. For Noein, having her by his side was already a given, and he intended to make that given eternal.
He had planned to save money for that purpose. He had decided to save his allowance little by little and buy Matilda for whatever price his father named, taking her with him.
However, that was just something Noein had thought about in his head. Noein himself thought it was only natural to do so, but there was no way she could know unless he said it out loud. She thought that someday Noein would leave this mansion without her.
Noein placed both hands on Matilda's face, and opened his mouth while gazing at her from a distance where their eyelashes almost touched.
"That day won't come, Matilda. When I'm driven out of the Kivileft Count household, I'm taking you with me. No matter how much it costs, I'll buy you from that damn father of mine and take you. If he refuses to sell you, I'll kidnap you and take you. I'll definitely take you. I've always been determined to do that. So we'll be together forever. Together for life. Let's live together, grow old together, die together. Let's love each other forever and ever."
Even from up close, he could see Matilda's eyes open wide.
"Matilda, will you stay by my side forever from now on?"
"...Yes. Please, let me dedicate everything I am by your side."
Smiling gently at Matilda, who answered while overflowing with torrents of tears, Noein finally brought his lips to hers.
Their lips met, and their breaths mingled within each other's mouths.
The kiss, sweeter and much deeper than the first, continued for a while after that.