Chapter 176 - The Absolute Truth
(1)
"Toya, that's bad."
Makoto told me.
I know it's bad.
I hate Nishimatsu-kun, who is smirking to himself.
"Toya, you'd better apologize sooner rather than later. Or rather, it might already be too late,"
Kiritani-kun says. Kiritani-kun probably understands my feelings well.
Since he's been suspected of cheating many times.
"Wouldn't it be easier on your mind to just give up now?"
When Nishimatsu-kun says that, everyone glares at him.
Nishimatsu-kun doesn't care one bit about such looks.
"Things like the bonds of love are nothing more than an illusion. In fact, your heart is wavering over a mere single kiss."
"Nishimatsu might be right,"
Watanabe-kun says with a laugh.
Nishimatsu-kun laughs, as if saying, See?
"Toya's overthinking it. Your love isn't something so fragile that it would crumble over one or two kisses, right? Why not just trust her?"
Sakai-kun and Ishihara-kun are consulting with each other.
Takemoto-kun also seems to be talking about something with Manabe-kun.
Kimoto-senpai seems to be of the same opinion as Watanabe-kun.
"You and Tosaka-san are on a completely different dimension from us. You'll probably get scolded a bit, but I don't think you need to consider the worst-case scenario. Though, I do think it's better to apologize early,"
he adds, noting that Hanayama-san is probably talking about it proudly right about now.
"Well, assuming Toya and Tosaka-san are fine... Manabe-kun, what on earth happened?"
If you use such a loud voice, the women in the bath next door will hear you, Watanabe-kun.
"N-no, it's nothing major."
Manabe-kun's attitude concerns me.
"Giving advice on that kind of thing is what our group is for, so you'd better be honest," Makoto says.
With a solemn expression, he began to speak.
Niina-san confessed to Manabe-kun. Manabe-kun turned her down, saying, "I already have someone I like."
When Niina-san asked, "Who is it?" he explained the situation.
The person he likes is the owner of the company where he works part-time, a widow who is still only twenty-six years old.
It makes you want to say, Of course that's impossible.
And so, Niina-san, who was in a state of excitement, had been wailing and crying.
"Manabe-kun, what do you think of Niina-san?"
I tried asking Manabe-kun.
"Well, I think she's a good person... but doesn't it feel kind of unpleasant to date someone when you have a primary interest?"
"Well, as the person being dated, it probably wouldn't feel great," Makoto says.
"I don't want to do something so dishonest either."
"Did you confess to your primary girlfriend?"
Watanabe-kun asked.
"No, not yet," Manabe-kun answers.
"Then you should just hurry up and confess," Watanabe-kun says casually.
"Please don't say it so casually. It's like the timing is always slightly off... she doesn't let the atmosphere become that kind of thing."
"There's always the option of being aggressive, right?"
"I'm the cautious type."
"Manabe-kun... the word 'cautious' doesn't apply in this group."
"Give me a break. She's still thinking about her dead husband."
"Making her forget is also an option, right?"
"She's a very fragile person, someone who seems like they'd break if touched... unfortunately, it's impossible unless I handle her gently."
"That's a tough one..."
"I'll handle my own business. More than that, I'm worried about Katagiri-senpai."
The conversation returned to me.
"There's no need to worry about Toya. Right, Toya?"
"I told her that I have something to talk about once we get out of the bath, so we should be alone."
"Why didn't you apologize on the spot? Hanayama-san is definitely talking in the bath."
Makoto stands up and scolds me.
"I wanted to... but I could only say sorry."
"I see..."
Makoto immerses himself in the bath again.
I think Makoto is right. I should have apologized on the spot.
But I couldn't even look Airi in the face. There's no way I could break that smile.
But if I don't say it properly, it'll be too late once things become irreparable.
What should I say?
Should I say it straight? Should I say it with a joke... no, not that.
"I think you should just convey your feelings properly,"
Sakai-kun encourages me.
"It's like an accident, right? A pretty malicious one. Tosaka-san isn't the type to be shaken by something like that,"
Ishihara-kun also tells me.
I hope that's the case; I want us to be laughing together after I tell her.
The more I thought that, the more the smile vanished from my face.
Nishimatsu-kun is laughing instead.
He's probably thinking, Just as planned!
It's beyond infuriating.
Right now, I could only pray that Airi's smile would not fade.
(2)
When I left the bath, Airi was waiting in front of the women's bath.
The door opened with a clatter, and they came out in a stream.
The women who came out glared at me.
Did she talk after all? Hanayama-san.
Some people were giggling.
When Kanna saw me, she gave me a little poke.
"You lucky bastard."
What does that mean? Did she not hear the story from Hanayama-san?
That Hanayama-san, as she came out, said to me:
"I won't lose."
Saying that, she followed the others.
Airi came out last.
When she saw me, she smiled brightly.
"Sorry to keep you waiting."
That voice was very bright.
But she might be faking it. Thinking that, I began to suspect the smile was faked too.
She might be unable to accept reality.
"Airi, about that talk..."
"We can't be alone here, you know?"
Told by Airi, I looked around; several people remained, watching us.
"I heard from Emi that there's a nice spot. Let's go there."
As Airi said that, she took my hand and began to walk slowly.
I followed Airi.
The balcony on the second floor of the lodging building. The night sky is very beautiful.
"It's really beautiful~. It's like when we came on Christmas Eve~."
At this time of year, it's neither hot nor cold, and a cool breeze blows occasionally.
Is the comfort of the spring breeze my last memory?
"Airi..."
"Ye~s?"
Airi, bright to the end. I didn't understand what was making Airi act this way.
I was at a loss for words. I have to deliver the words of the end.
I was scared. Of being hated by Airi...
But if I don't say it, I won't keep secrets from Airi. Because I was the one who decided that.
"Airi, listen..."
"Ah, wait a second."
As Airi said that, she made a gesture as if she were praying.
"...Okay, go ahead."
When Airi said that, I bowed my head to her.
"Airi, I'm sorry. I kissed Hanayama-san! But it was an accident. She suddenly hugged me..."
"...Liar."
"Eh?"
"It wasn't that you 'kissed' her, but that you 'were kissed,' right? I heard it from Hanayama-san."
"But isn't that just a quibble?"
Airi approaches me. And then...
Poke
"Do you know why I'm angry?"
"Because I cheated."
"So, is that cheating? You were forced, right? Even though Toya-kun didn't intend to."
"That's true, but..."
"The proof is that I look upset to you. Toya-kun, you haven't truly entered my world. It's Toya-kun's bad habit. You're afraid of me and reject my world. You don't look at me properly. It's always like that. At the most crucial moments, you don't look at me properly."
"S-sorry. That's why..."
"Boo. I can't forgive you. I'll give you a penalty game."
She's not going to say we're breaking up here, is she?
"Close your eyes."
I close my eyes as Airi tells me.
Then Airi wraps her arms around my back and presses her lips against mine.
Not only that, Airi's tongue asserts its desire to enter my mouth. I gratefully accept that affection.
Airi lets out a sweet sigh, "Nn..." And then she pulls away from my mouth.
"Now we're even, Toya-kun. No matter who kisses you, I'll overwrite it with my color."
Airi's face was flushed.
"Look, listen to the voice of my heart..."
Keeping her arms around my back, Airi presses her chest against my body.
It is a very gentle world. A happy world embracing under the starry sky.
"I acknowledge that you didn't keep it a secret. I acknowledge that it was an accident. I also understand how anxious Toya-kun was. But I want you to trust me a little. I'm not so weak that I'd waver over a single kiss."
Airi says this while pressing her face against my chest.
Was I overthinking it?
"But I'm happy, that you're worrying about me that much. You're afraid of losing me, aren't you? Don't worry. As long as Toya-kun's feelings don't change, I am Toya-kun's."
I can understand Airi's heart a little; it's overflowing with a compassionate heart like that of a Holy Mother. I want to protect that heart so it doesn't get hurt.
Before I knew it, I was hugging Airi's body.
"It seems I was the only one worrying."
"That's right, ah... but."
"If you go to a soapland or those kinds of shops, I really won't forgive you. I'll tell Maya-san that you cheated!"
"I wouldn't do that!"
"Yep, I believe you!"
As the night deepened, the wind became a bit colder. When I said to Airi, "Shall we go back?" Airi nodded and said, "...Yes."
"Ah!"
"Hoe?"
There was still something I hadn't asked.
"Was Airi okay on your end?"
"I was hit on. She tried to touch my shoulder, so I brushed her off."
"And what happened then?"
"Nothing happened. Ah, Toya-kun still doesn't trust me. Once the training camp is over, it's time for thorough education."
"E-education?"
"I'll let you be as spoiled as you want and teach you plenty about how much I love you♪"
Does that count as education?
"Well, shall we go to the others?"
"Yeah... ah!"
"Is there something else?"
"Um... what were you talking about in the women's bath?"
"I don't think it's good to stick your nose into maidenly talk."
"Ah, right, sorry."
"Just kidding... you mustn't tell anyone."
So she will tell me.
"Right, at first we were worrying about Niina-san."
The time goes back to the bath time.
(3)
We were washing our bodies and having a conversation while half-bathing in the tub.
Since there were people meeting for the first time, we were chatting and giggling while greeting each other.
But there was one person who was depressed.
Niina-san.
The person who was the source of the commotion earlier.
She was immersed in the tub alone, lost in her own thoughts.
When Ai asked, "What's wrong?" Niina-san began to talk.
Even though she had lost herself, she had done such a thing. She didn't know how to talk to Manabe-kun from now on.
"Isn't it fine to just be normal?"
Ai says.
"I agree with Ai. You can't quite give up yet, right... though, if you're too aggressive, you'll be hated,"
Kanna says, glancing at Hanayama-san.
"It's not decided that you're hated yet, right? Then you have no choice but to push hard!"
Mika-san encourages her.
"Mirai, cheer up," Kinoshita-san, who was next to Niina-san, cheers her on.
"A devoted girl like you wouldn't be hated. It's not like he's gotten a girlfriend yet, so let's do our best," Ai says, and Hanayama-san suddenly bursts out laughing.
"You support such a cowardly girl, but is no one supporting me?"
When Hanayama-san says that, Ai retorts, "Because we're in the middle of a game with you. Moreover, there's no way any idiot would support you when their own boyfriend is being targeted."
"Well, it doesn't really matter~. Toya-kun is only a matter of time..."
"That's been bothering me for a while, but what did you do to Katagiri-kun? Katagiri-kun seemed depressed."
"It's nothing major. Why don't you ask Katagiri-kun later~?"
"That means something did happen, right?"
"Who knows~?"
"Katagiri-kun's behavior was indeed strange earlier. He was terribly depressed, or rather..."
It was as Emi said; when he told me he had something to talk about, he was terribly sunk.
"There's no reason to be depressed... I think it's normal skinship for university students."
Skinship?
"Tell us! What did you do to Toya-kun!?"
When I say that, she begins to talk as if to say, Good grief.
"I just kissed him~. He's quite pure, isn't he~. He was terribly flustered."
A kiss... At first, I was shaken. Is it cheating? Is that what he meant when he said he had something to talk about?
I think of Toya-kun. He was terribly depressed. That's not to tell me we're breaking up. Toya-kun is surely regretting it. Even though it was done to him, he's suffering from the guilt of having kissed someone other than me.
Then what should I do? Should I support him, saying it's okay? I think a kiss without feeling probably isn't that pleasant. He kissed someone other than his fiancée. And because of that, Toya-kun is suffering so much. That alone makes me happy.
"Ahaha."
I let out a laugh.
"What's so funny?"
Hanayama-san asks suspiciously.
"Because, I realized Toya-kun was depressed over something like that."
"Airi-chan, are you okay? Did your head go crazy from anger?"
Emi asks worriedly.
"I'm fine, Emi. Hanayama-san might be right. A kiss is an accident that can happen to any university student."
"An accident?"
"Yes, besides, a kiss without emotion is just lips touching, isn't it?"
"When you put it that way, it's true. But even if it's an accident, can you forgive Toya-kun, Airi?"
"I forgive him. Toya-kun said he had something to talk about with me later and was terribly depressed. I'm sure it's about that."
"He might bring up breaking up~."
"Hanayama-san, I don't think that's the case. I think Toya-kun intends to apologize. He was reflecting deeply. When I realize that's what it is, I can't help but laugh."
"A kiss without emotion is just an accident where lips touched... huh."
Shimizu-san is depressed. What's wrong?
"I kissed him on impulse before. I wonder if he doesn't feel the same way...?"
"I don't think that's it, Shimizu-san. Because you put your feelings into it, right?"
"That's true... but he hasn't done anything for me since then."
"Shimizu-san, let me tell you as his ex-girlfriend, I think he won't do anything unless you take action, Shimizu-san."
Honoka said that.
"What a convenient interpretation. Are you saying my feelings weren't contained in it?"
When Hanayama-san says that, Emi replies.
"Are you actually serious about Katagiri-kun?"
"Of course not. ...Though I think he's not bad."
"I see, you're wavering."
Saying that, a smile spills from Emi.
"It wouldn't be interesting otherwise. Because from now on, you'll experience genuine frustration."
"I have no intention of failing."
"That's what they all think at first. But Airi-chan and the others will never waver. Don't you understand even after hearing that story?"
"The last resort is to sleep with him."
"Seeing Hanayama-san when she fails after sinking herself that far will be a sight to behold."
I'll stop that much, at least.
But as for Toya-kun, I don't think that will happen.
"Toya is a lucky man. To be loved this much by Airi."
Kanna lets that slip.
"That's right, Toya is a lucky man."
Mika-san continues.
"I think everyone feels the same, but especially Ai... I thought you'd understand my feelings?"
"Well... Eita is even worse,"
Ai says, and everyone laughs.
"I'm envious of Tosaka-san," Kana says, and "Yes, I'm envious too," Kinoshita-san says.
Everyone is the same. That feeling doesn't change. Since we've made it this far, we surely will from now on too.
"I hope your feelings reach him too, Kinoshita-san."
I said that to Kinoshita-san, but there was no reaction.
"Umi, are you okay?"
Niina-san hurriedly pulls Kinoshita-san out of the tub.
"Funya~."
It seems she stayed in the bath a bit too long.
"Shall we head out soon?"
When I say that, everyone leaves.
"In reality, how is it? Do you intend to forgive him?"
Kanna asks. I nod.
"If I can't forgive, it would be Toya-kun for not trusting me over something like that."
"You two really haven't changed since middle school. You're always thinking of each other."
"Kanna, you've accepted Makoto-kun too, haven't you?"
"Apparently Makoto was hit on by Hanayama too."
Kanna whispered.
"And what happened?"
"The fact that he went out of his way to tell me means that's how it is, right?"
She says it as if it's obvious. Indeed, I don't think anyone who cheats would go out of their way to report, "I was hit on."
"We're both being cherished, aren't we?"
"Yeah."
It was a spring evening composing a song of unchanging love.
(4)
"...And that's why. Toya-kun doesn't need to worry about it."
"I see..."
Toya-kun looks a bit embarrassed.
The two of us are talking while walking back the way we came.
"Niina-san... is she okay?"
"She'll be perfectly fine by tomorrow."
"I see... then it's fine."
"What about Takemoto-kun?"
When I ask, Toya-kun says, "Ah!" as if remembering.
"I completely forgot. Everyone was so absorbed in Manabe-kun's story."
"Manabe-kun has it rough too. Even though we said we'd support Niina-san."
"It must be hard. I don't know since I've never experienced that."
This person doesn't seem to understand the situation he's currently in.
That's fine, this person...
It's fine as long as he only thinks of me.
Though he's always thinking about food.
Though he occasionally thinks about naughty things.
That's okay because I'm here, right?
Toya-kun likes me and I like Toya-kun.
That is the absolute, unchanging truth.
"Airi... thank you."
"Hoe?"
"Even though I'm like this... even though I occasionally let my guard down and make mistakes..."
Poke
"I don't care about things that have already passed. I told you earlier. It's just an accident, so there's no need to worry about it."
"That's right."
Toya-kun gives a wry smile.
Uuu... I've never felt a night so frustrating.
If this were Toya-kun's house, if it were a night for just the two of us. I'd become one with Toya-kun.
When we get back, I'll spoil him a lot. I'll talk about love a lot. I'll be loved a lot.
"Ah, there you are. Airi! Everyone's waiting! Hurry up and come!"
It seems Ai was looking for us.
They're probably all making a racket, right?
"Shall we go?"
Toya-kun looks a bit disappointed.
Was he feeling the same as me?
"We have to go, right?"
"Yeah..."
He lets out a sigh.
"It's okay, I'll spoil you after we get back, Toya-kun."
Saying that, I hug Toya-kun.
"I'll let you spoil me plenty then."
You said it, right? It's a promise.
We headed toward the room.
Holding the absolute truth in our hearts.
The spring night does not yet sleep.