Chapter 83 - Makoto Tada
(1)
Sports Park
Students from our Hofu High School and Johou Science High School were crowding the area.
The regional high school soccer tournament semifinals.
Once it reaches the semifinals, people are mobilized for cheering.
Though, I wonder how many of the boys from my school were actually captivated by the soccer?
The uniforms of the girls from Johou are exceptionally popular within the prefecture.
Short skirts on top of an already popular uniform.
Since my class was positioned next to the Johou side, there were many guys blatantly staring.
Just because the uniforms are cute, an upward correction is applied to the girls' actual appeal.
I happen to be the type who doesn't sway even for girls with such a correction.
The juice that was sold during the Koshien qualifiers isn't available now.
I'm thirsty...
I'll stand up and go look for a vending machine... maybe I should have bought some beforehand.
Tug!
See, I knew you'd stop me.
It's not food, I'm just thirsty. Hydration is important, Airi.
As if reading my feelings, Airi took a water bottle out of her bag and handed it to me.
Thanks, Airi! You're so thoughtful.
I take a sip.
I'm coming back to life!!
"Airi is so thoughtful... she'll make a great wife."
Kanna, who was watching the scene next to us, let a comment slip.
Right?
Though the partner is probably already decided.
Airi looks at my face.
She seems to want me to say something.
Her eyes are sparkling.
"I think so too."
Airi is excited all by herself.
"To think I can be such a good partner for Toya-kun!"
No, I didn't say anything that specific, Airi.
I suppose the correction function in Airi's ears is applying an upward correction to the words.
Ah, the match has started.
The soccer club from Johou is apparently reasonably strong.
After all, they supposedly made it to the best four by defeating Ida High.
Come to think of it, I heard Makoto was absent for Ida High.
Where did I get that information from?
Sakoshita-san went out of her way to tell me.
She's watching the match with a gloomy expression.
Maybe I'll ask her later?
For now, let's watch the match.
Eh? You're worried that if I watch the match, I'll get lost in it again?
There aren't any players I'm particularly focused on, so it'll probably be fine.
By the way, all the boys are lost in the Johou girls.
I'll pray that they don't get lost inside their skirts.
Getting arrested for that would be pathetic, even for them.
As for me, as I said before, I wasn't particularly bothered.
Or rather, the two girls next to me were preventing it.
If I were staring, I'd probably be yelled at by one, and the other would shamelessly say, "Just make do with mine!"
More importantly, the match...
Yeah, our school's keeper has good momentum.
He's coming out properly when he should.
His saving ability is quite good too.
Still, isn't our school being attacked too much...
Look, there's space open in the back.
"Hey—"
Hmm, if they're going to press, they need to close the passing lanes more.
"Toya-kun, really~"
Ah, the keeper's vision is blocked right there.
See, they scored. Just as I thought.
Cheers erupt from the Johou camp.
Some girls stood up in joy.
Some boys immediately took photos with their smartphones...
"You guys have been annoying for a while now! If you're that interested in short skirts, go look somewhere else!"
Kanna stood up and raised her voice in anger.
For the record, both Airi and Kanna are wearing short skirts right now.
"Kanna, calm down."
Airi tries to calm Kanna down.
"What's the matter, Otonashi? Are you on your period?"
Because one of the boys said something like that...
Crack!
That's probably the correct sound effect.
Kanna's kick caught the boy's face.
"That hurts! What the hell are you doing!"
The boy shouted while bleeding from his nose.
Normally, Kanna would be intimidated by shouting, but today is different.
I hurriedly hold Kanna back.
Mizuta-sensei appeared.
"What's wrong with you people, watch the match quietly! ...You, what happened to that nosebleed?"
There probably aren't many boys who could say "I was kicked by a girl" here.
If there were, I'd respect them in a way.
Someone made an excuse, saying, "He was getting excited looking at the Johou girls."
"You lot... focus on the match properly."
Saying that, Mizuta-sensei positioned himself near us.
To be precise, he positioned himself next to me.
And he whispered in my ear.
"I heard from Mikimoto-sensei that you're apparently still registered as a player."
Huh?
"What do you want to do? Want to go in now?"
"I won't!"
I answered immediately.
"Right, I'll let them know."
With that, Mizuta-sensei left.
"Toya's become able to say things clearly now."
Kanna said that and patted my back.
After thinking for a while, she whispered secretly to me and Airi.
"There's something I want to talk about later. Makoto told me to keep quiet about it... but I feel like it's too late for that now."
"...I had something I wanted to ask too."
It's probably the same thing.
"More importantly, Toya-kun, you were lost in it again just now!"
"Eh?"
"I kept calling you until Kanna yelled, but you didn't notice at all!"
"Ah..."
I did it again.
"Honestly, share a bit of that Toya's state with the other boys."
Kanna said exasperatedly.
More importantly, I noticed a moment ago that the gazes of the Johou students are bothering me.
It's better not to repeat my name too much.
"What's wrong, Toya-kun?"
I was called immediately.
Do Airi and the others not notice these strange gazes?
"Isn't that person the one who was on TV?"
"Eh, but the match is happening now, right? There's no way he's here."
"Didn't they just say he's not playing soccer anymore?"
That's right, I'm not playing soccer.
So please leave me alone.
I decided to focus on the match.
"Hey, Toya-kun."
Stop it, don't call me.
"He's lost in it again!"
I'm not.
"Toya-kun, really~!!"
Airi shakes my body.
"Um..."
A Johou female student calls out to me.
"By any chance, are you Katagiri Toya-kun?"
It's better to ignore this.
"He is~"
Of course, Airi answers instead.
With that one word, the female students began to make a fuss as if a dam had burst.
"Um, please shake my hand!"
"Why did you quit soccer!?"
"No way, it's the real thing!!"
"Which one is the girlfriend who's the reason you quit!"
If I answer, it'll be bad.
"It's me~"
Just how honest is this girl?
The target shifted to Airi.
"Normally, wouldn't a girlfriend encourage soccer!?"
"Why won't you let him play soccer!?"
"I mean, isn't the possessive type annoying?"
After listening to the other party's arguments, Airi answered quietly.
"I think forcing someone to do something they don't want to do is more annoying, don't you?"
The other party didn't back down.
"How do you know he doesn't want to? He might just be holding back!"
"If you've dated for five years, you'll have your share of clashes and understand the other person a bit."
Kanna, who had been silent until then, spoke up.
"I mean, the most irritating thing is you guys making a fuss and acting like fangirls without knowing anything."
Is this what they call the calm before the storm?
Before the storm arrived, a Johou teacher came to collect the commotion.
"Toya-kun, don't let it get to you."
Airi says, rubbing my back.
But I was thinking about something else.
Isn't Kanna strangely irritable today?
By the way, we lost the match 2-0.
(2)
After the match ended, I bought a juice and drank it all.
Now that the crowd has dispersed and there are fewer people, shall I listen to Kanna's story?
Hmm, okonomiyaki is in the opposite direction, and here...
Poke
"A family restaurant is fine, right?"
"Let's go to a coffee shop for once!"
"I don't like coffee."
"They have tea and juice too!"
"Hmm..."
"Listen to Toya's request for once."
Kanna provides an exquisite assist, seizing the moment.
"Then, at that place..."
"Melon soda and miso katsu bread and special pizza and beef stew..."
Poke
I was poked by Airi.
"Pick just one!"
"...Melon soda and miso katsu bread."
"I'll have iced tea."
"Blend coffee."
The clerk took the order and stepped back.
"Listening to you two's interaction, I really start to think you're a couple."
Kanna says with a sigh.
"Because Toya-kun is..."
When Airi says that, Kanna laughs.
"I know, but Airi, you should give up now. He'll never be cured in his lifetime."
"Uuu..."
Airi is troubled.
"So, Kanna, about what you said earlier..."
I change the subject.
"Right, that. Actually, it seems Makoto injured his ankle before the regional tournament."
"Eh!?"
"Eh~"
"You two are too loud!"
Kanna calms me and Airi down.
"So, he was absent from the tournament itself, and as you both know, they lost to Johou in the third round."
I see, Makoto must have been frustrated.
If it were me, I'd curse my injured self.
They say injuries are part of the game, but the timing was too bad.
"And, I want to consult Toya about something..."
I hate to say it, but with Johou's sieve-like defense, Makoto alone could have scored plenty. His absence was a blow.
I didn't watch the match, but it probably became a one-sided game, similar to our school's.
"Toya-kun? Are you listening?"
In today's match too, not to brag, but I'm confident I could have broken through.
Setting aside whether the passes would come.
Ah, was the match between the Tokyo representative and Amayama High something similar?
Like it would work out however as long as the passes connected.
Well, defense is important to crush those passes, I suppose.
If it were me, I'd mark that Oki-kun person tightly.
I was thinking alone while making bubbles in my juice.
Thinking?
Ah, this might be bad.
Airi blows breath behind my ear without any hesitation.
"Fwah!?"
"Geez, you were lost in it again, weren't you! Kanna is consulting you."
"Ah, sorry. So, the consultation is..."
Kanna took a breath and said softly.
"...If it were Toya, what would make you happy? What would be a comfort?"
Ah, I see.
She wants to encourage Makoto, who is heartbroken from the loss.
Let's see, if it were me, I think I'd be happy just having someone by my side without doing anything.
I glance at Airi.
Airi would surely do this and that to encourage me, but it might be troublesome to have someone be too considerate.
"Toya?"
Whether it's complaining or whining, I don't know how to put it, but I feel like I'd be saved just by letting out what's bottled up in my heart and having someone accept it.
Well, there are times when just acting bright and playing as if nothing happened would be enough to make me happy.
Which one is Makoto? I feel like either would be fine; the fact that Kanna is being considerate is enough.
That alone might make him happy.
Ah, but there's the possibility that he'd get irritated by the consideration... no, not Makoto.
"Toya, are you listening!?"
Ah, I was lost in it again.
But I was worrying about Kanna.
Kanna, huh...
I look closely at Kanna's face.
"W-what is it?"
"Makoto's injury is healed, right?"
"Yeah, he didn't make it in time for the match, but he's fully recovered."
"Then it's simple..."
Kanna left halfway because she had a part-time job.
After that, I went home with Airi.
"Toya-kun. Is that really all that's needed?"
Airi asked.
"Yeah, basically, as long as he can take his mind off it. After that, if Kanna's kindness reaches him, Makoto will probably be fine... provided his personality hasn't changed."
"Were you thinking of that by projecting yourself onto him, Toya-kun?"
"Yeah, and I also took Makoto's personality into account."
"Hmm, I thought the correct answer would be to leave him alone."
I think that's also a correct answer.
But if we do that...
"If we do that, Airi wouldn't be satisfied, right? Airi's mood wouldn't clear up, right?"
"Well, I think I would feel restless. But if leaving him alone is kindness..."
"That kind of kindness might actually make Makoto feel obligated. It's okay, Makoto will surely notice Kanna's kindness."
"Hmm... If Toya-kun were depressed, I'd scold you! Don't mope around! I'd say."
"Thanks, that's fine for Airi. Because Airi is like that, I can feel safe being depressed."
"What would Toya-kun do if I were depressed?"
I thought for a bit.
"I guess I'd stay by your side. Telling you I'm here. That I'll wait without going anywhere."
"Thank you. Then I'm going to be depressed forever!"
"Eh?"
"Because if I'm depressed, you'll stay by my side forever, right!?"
Airi said that and laughed.
The best option is "not letting Airi get depressed," though.
No matter what happens, this time I won't waver.
(3)
We met in front of the station.
Then he appeared wearing a hooded coat, a big knit sweater, and skinny pants.
"Sorry to keep you waiting."
"I just got here too."
"But this is rare, or rather, is it the first time? Kanna invited me!"
Makoto's tension is high as soon as he arrives.
Though he might just be acting that way.
"Well then, let's sing our hearts out today!"
"Yeah, it's been a while! I want to hear that thing of Kanna's!"
"Alright."
Saying that, the two of them sang for six hours at karaoke.
By the time we came out, both of their throats were raspy.
"Phew, I'm satisfied!"
"Yeah."
It seems he was satisfied.
I hope he forgets about it with this...
However, it wasn't going to go that smoothly.
Text appearing on the city's electronic billboard.
Regional High School Soccer Tournament: Johou Science Victory.
Ah, the ones who beat us... wait, idiot, I don't need that information right now!
When I glanced at Makoto, he was staring intently at the electronic billboard.
I mustn't get depressed here too.
"I'm hungry after singing. Let's eat something before going home!"
"Yeah, there was a shop I've wanted to try once."
Saying that, Makoto took my hand and started walking.
The shop we arrived at was a Western-style restaurant near the park.
I matched my order to Makoto's.
When the clerk took the order and stepped back, Makoto suddenly let it slip.
"Maybe I'll quit soccer too and go to a local university?"
I almost spilled my water.
"Why would it turn into that?"
"Then I can live with Kanna without any problems, right?"
I was supposed to have come to encourage Makoto today.
Should I have just smiled and said "I'm so happy~"?
But I was inexplicably angry.
"Don't mess with me..."
"Eh?"
"I said don't mess with me!"
There were a fair number of customers in the shop.
Those customers all looked at us at once.
"Kanna, calm down."
"How can I be calm, who do you think caused this! Quit soccer? Is it something you can give up so easily over a single failure!"
"Toya is pretty much the same."
"Toya and you are different!"
"We're not! Didn't Toya also break down over a single failure!"
"No! You're just running away. Just because you got injured once! Just because you missed Nationals, it's not something you can just throw away!"
"Isn't it weird that for Toya it's 'respecting his will' but for me it's 'don't run away'!?"
"Um, customers... please be a little quieter."
The clerk cautioned us.
"Fine... I'll respect your will. In exchange, you'll respect my will too: 'I'm breaking up with you'."
"...For Kanna, is soccer everything to me?"
"No, it's because you were shining the most when you were playing soccer. I never thought you were such a weakling that you'd break over something like this."
"Something like this... do you even understand my feelings, Kanna?"
"If you're going to say that, do you understand my feelings, having to say goodbye to the boyfriend I love?"
"Then you don't have to say it."
"You won't understand if I don't say it!"
Why did it turn out like this?
I just wanted to encourage Makoto.
I just put into practice "support him" as Toya told me.
"Toya quit soccer of his own will and got together with Airi, and then he chose Airi. But Makoto is trying to run away from soccer using me as a reason. I'd rather break up than be used as a pretext."
I started feeling pathetic saying it myself.
Before I knew it, I was crying.
"Maybe I was spoiled by Kanna..."
It's okay to be spoiled.
I just don't want you to be swept away.
I don't want you to give up on your dream so easily.
Continuing soccer is your dream, right?
If I'm to be used as a pretext to give up that dream, I'll step aside.
It's a painful choice.
But if it's for Makoto's sake, I'll dare to choose it.
It seems something clicked inside Makoto.
"Let's eat before it gets cold."
Huh?
I can't believe he can spit out a line like that in this situation.
Can he even read the room?
Since Makoto started eating in silence, I ate too.
Once my stomach was full, my head cooled down.
And I felt terribly depressed.
That this is the end with Makoto too.
Neither of us said anything.
I walked him to the bus terminal.
"See ya..."
As I tried to walk away, Makoto stopped me.
"Wait, Kanna."
Makoto grabbed my arm.
"Let go."
That's enough, right? We've talked enough, haven't we?
If something has been decided inside you, there's nothing more to say.
"I have one request."
"A request?"
Makoto nodded.
"Fine, what is it, say it."
"Punch me?"
Huh?
"What did you just say?"
"I said punch me."
I see, you want to be knocked flying that badly?
"...Plant your feet. Grit your teeth."
"Yeah, I'm fine."
I punched him with all my might with a closed fist.
Though Makoto wasn't so weak that he'd be blown away just because I, a girl who isn't particularly trained, punched him.
"Thanks, I feel refreshed now."
Refreshed... were you a masochist?
I thought you were more of a sadist.
"Thanks, I feel refreshed too."
See ya, I said, and tried to move to my own boarding area.
Then Makoto hugged me from behind.
What are you doing? You're refreshed, right? Just leave me alone now.
"We're made up now, right?"
Huh?
Why does it turn into that?
When I looked back, Makoto was smiling while bleeding from his mouth.
It's a bit of a horror movie.
"What are you talking about?"
"Seeing Kanna's tears woke me up. Being punched by Kanna cleared my head. I'll continue soccer. So the talk about breaking up is off."
"...This time it's 'I won't quit because I was told we're breaking up'?"
Should I punch you one more time?
"No, I can't say it's completely different. But I've stopped running away from soccer. I still want to live together, though."
What is this man talking about?
"Sorry, I finally realized after hearing Kanna's feelings. You'd hate to be made to carry a burden. I was making Kanna do that."
"If you understand, then it's fine, right? Let go."
"I'll never make the same mistake again. Won't you forgive me?"
"Geez, why are men so dull, sly, and cowardly... I get it, so let go, people are staring."
"Then, you'll forgive me, right?"
"Fine, but only this once."
That's a lie.
I'll forgive him over and over, won't I?
Just like with Airi and the others.
Again and again.
Until it reaches an unchanging love.
"Then, you're staying over tonight."
Huh?
"You're feeling pumped up now, right?"
This guy is a complete idiot.
A side of Makoto that nobody knows.
"...Do you also desire play where I stomp on you with boots?"
"Ugh... if Kanna desires it..."
"As if I would!!"
I can say it now.
Makoto is no different from Toya.
Not that different.
Makoto seems to understand, but he doesn't.
I'll just accept that's who Makoto is.
Because I'm here. Because I'll wait without going anywhere. I just want him to stay as he is.
I'm here, but I want to gaze upon those eyes of Makoto's.
I want him to understand. I'm always waiting.